Submitted by Danny Grubb, Seattle, WA

Todd Barrett Lieman didn’t know anything about pregnancy.  Like in most cases, this wasn’t a problem until his wife was expecting.  He was smart enough to realize how much he knew and started looking for a resource which would put things in terms he could understand. Unless you’re already in the medical profession you won’t know what an Episiotomy is, but as a Dad you need to find out.  That’s why Todd wrote a book for Dads which goes through all of the hard stuff (or just hard to pronounce stuff) from A to Z.

This Book Is Hilarious!

I was expecting a lot of dumbed-down explanations.  What I didn’t expect was that this book takes great care to educate and be extremely funny at the same time.  For instance, when discussing Meconium Poop:

“Meconium Poop is sterile and odorless, but its the stickiest, blackest, most tarlike substance you will ever see coming from your baby’s newborn butt.  It even bubbles on exit.  Yeah, its pretty gross.”

There are comics sprinkled throughout the book which are really something to look forward to (I say this as a comic strip connoisseur!)  So if you decide to read the book from beginning to end (not recommended) you’ll have a mental break every few pages.  If only the Dictionary was so kind.

It Avoids Manliness Where Necessary

Not all things can be talked about with a macho, sarcastic tone of voice. Some moments during pregnancy and early parenthood are just too special.  Here is his definition for Cooing:

“It is the greatest sound you’ll ever hear and a reward for enduring all the sleepless nights, early morning feedings and blow-out clean ups. Your baby will just look up at you and make the most gentle, cute little sound you’ve ever heard. And, it’ll melt your heart.”

He’s not wrong about that.

It Is A Go-To Guide For Layman (Dads)

Yes, this book is funny and informative, but what is most important is that this book is instantly useful.  It is even small enough to take with you to your wife’s OB visits.  When the doctor explains something that sounds like “Bla bla bla, Latin word, bla bla bla” you can look up the Latin word while still in the office and know whether you should be worried or not. 

This book is useful if you’re looking for a resource which gives you a bottom-line perspective on common pregnancy and parenthood issues.  The only time I wouldn’t use it is in cases where something serious happens and you truly need to be educated on the subject, but hopefully those cases will be rare.

Disclosure: The Book was provided to me free of charge by the Author.

Giveaway – 5 Copies of “ABCs For Expectant Dads”

Per my Disclosure Policy every review will be followed by a giveaway.  So here are the rules:

1. The deadline for entering is 11:59pm, Monday, February 15th.
2. To Enter:
   • Subscribe to get GladDads.com in your inbox (Current subscribers are automatically entered) OR
   • Mention this giveaway on your blog and email me the link (gladdads(at)gmail(dot)com).
3. Limit: 1 entry per person.

Good Luck!

Submitted by Danny Grubb, Seattle, WA

Recently California's Manifee Union School District banned the Dictionary because the phrase "Oral Sex". It deemed that the phrase was not age appropriate and had to review the appropriateness of the Merriam-Webster's Collegiate Dictionary (MWCD) in its classroom. It wasn't even a student who found the term, it was a parent. The school district has since read the Dictionary and approved it for use by its 4th and 5th grade classes unless a parent objects. In those cases there is a dumbed down version of the Dictionary that the student can use. To be fair, there were objections from other parents to the ban, but fear held sway.

Dictionaries Have Words We Use

What that means to the rest of us is that whatever were talking about gets into the dictionary. If were talking about "Oral Sex" then they have to define it. Its their job. The words Genocide, Decapitate and Disembowel are probably in both the Collegiate and the dumbed down Dictionaries, but in the Manifee Union School District parents for some reason are much more afraid of sexual references than violence.

Dirty Word + 10 Year Old = Giggling!

I know enough about 10 year olds to know that the worst that would happen is giggling. The definition used in the MWCD was "Oral Stimulation of the genitals". Not only is this a very hard phrase to giggle at, the students would have likely had to look up 2 or 3 more words to really understand the meaning of the phrase. It would have been the most motivated learning they did all year. Because nothing's funnier than a dirty word, especially one that the parents show fear towards.

Only Boneheads Ban Books

Yes there are books out there that you probably wouldn't want your 10 year old to read. Fine, I'll concede that point. But at home and in the classroom having these books around if anything is more appropriate because there are adults to provide context. I don't think that I've ever cracked a dictionary anywhere else but at home and at school. Are you telling me that a teacher doesn't notice if a student picks up a Dictionary? When I was going to school you only cracked that book when you had an assignment! Not for fun.

So these kids have learned that you can ban an entire body of work over one phrase. They have also learned that anything with dirty words is unfit for reading. The parents who are sticking to their guns on this issue will have students who read very thin dictionaries if only "age appropriate" words are left in.  I don’t know about anyone else, but when I was 10 I could make any word sound dirty.

But enough about what I think, do you think this ban was appropriate?

Photo © Belongs To: http://www.flickr.com/photos/lochaven/

Submitted by Joe Beckman at Papagio.net

Parenting is difficult. No if's, ands, or buts about it. I'm all about having kids...seriously instead of reading this, you should be trying to make babies. However, with that said, it should NOT be something that is done because you just "think" you are ready. You want your marriage to survive? You want to be the best dad you can be? Than you better not just "think" you are ready... you better "KNOW." Here are 5 things to think about before making this decision. Read them and make sure you are able to check ALL of them off.

1. Take Care Of The Problems You And Your Significant Other Are Dealing With First (At Least The Big Ones)

Truth is, if you think you are going to be stable, strong, and respectful parents if you're not even stable, strong or respectful to your spouse/partner, you are WRONG! Having a kid does not make things go away. Sure it may sweep it under the rug for a bit, but you need to sweep it back out and clean it up before you bring another human life into this world.

2. Experience Life And Everything That It Has To Offer

This doesn't mean go jump out of an airplane, or climb Mt. Everest, or wrestle an alligator, (unless any of that excites you) but rather do one or two things (or more) that you have always wanted to do. If you are a huge baseball nut, go visit Wrigley Field, if you are a Trekky, go to a Star Trek Convention, if you have always wanted to see the The Coliseum up close and personal, book the first flight to Rome. Go do it now! You'll be a better dad because of it.

3. Talk Finances

This is big. Maybe the most important considering how financially draining it is to have children. Now, I'm not advocating to wait with kids until you have made your first million...there are plenty of families who are check to check and still very content. But if you don't plan on how you are going to pay $10,000/year on daycare (oh yes, it's possible) you're going to be in a sticky wicket. You'll pull from other areas to pay, and then you'll accumulate debt, and then that really job that your were once okay with starts to become that stupid company that doesn't pay you enough, you get bitter and bitter and more bitter. Create a plan. And then create a Plan B. (need a financial advisor? I have a great lady that I trust more then anyone with my money. Contact me, and I'll hook you up)

4. Communicate Parenting Styles

This could be a 2 page story on it's own. Look, 100% of parents want to do the best for their kids, and about 99% of spouses will have different ideas on how to make that happen. Sit down and talk each other. Read books. Ask friends/co-workers/neighbors or any other couples that you trust and respect how the approach they are taking. From there, talk to your spouse about what you really feel strongly about, and be prepared to have a reasonable explanation why. You can't just say, "I think spanking is the right choice for disciplining because that's how my parents did it, and it worked on me." Think through your reasons, and don't be SO stuck on one issue that you are not willing to budge. It's all about compromise here, and the more you are willing to budge on certain things, the more likely your spouse will too.

5. Make A Pact, A Mission, A Mantra Etc… That You Are Going To Remember To Always Be Good To Your Significant Other

So the truth behind all of this is that no matter how hard you plan and how ready you are, it's going to a challenge. You ever see the Amazing Race? Sometime even the most likeable couples get ugly every once in while. The stress is just too much. However, the more you can stick true to a common mission of being good and respectful to your partner, the faster you are going to pull through. Write it down, paint it on a wall, tattoo it on your forearm in Chinese letters. Do what it takes to remind yourself to be good to your teammate during this time.

Joe Beckman is the founder of Papagio.net.  He believes in honoring Dads and the unique attributes they provide when invested and involved.  You can find him on TV, Facebook, and Twitter.

Photo © Belongs To: http://www.flickr.com/photos/batega/

Submitted by Danny Grubb, Seattle, WA

Homer Simpson is a bad neighbor. 

He endangers himself and those around him, his abject laziness brings down the property values of everyone on Evergreen Terrace, and he has on permanent loan almost every piece of home improvement equipment that Ned Flanders owns. 

Could it be that Ned Flanders' willingness to give is a remnant of a bygone era and that Homer Simpson is the new wave? 

The next time you have the opportunity to share consider the following.

What Sharing Was

Wikipedia say: Sharing is the joint use of a resource or space.  Seems simple enough, but whenever you start getting people involved things can get much more complicated.  People bring motivation, bias, and emotion to what should be a straightforward process.  Ideally, people share for one of these reasons:

1. To feel closer to the other individual.
2. Because they trust the other individual.
3. Because the other individual needed the resource more.
4. To be altruistic and contribute to the common good, man.

What Non-Sharing Is

I only blame Homer Simpson in part for this. In my own experience I often feel like the reasons for sharing have become more economical than altruistic.  It seems like everyone who is asked to share a resource asks themselves (and sometimes the person making the request) "What's in it for me?"  I have been guilty of this and I find it disturbing.  From this cynics point of view, this is why people don't share these days:

1. Pride: They are so proud of their possession that they do not want to part with it, even if its just sitting in the shed.
2. Distrust: In today's crime drama saturated world, everyone is a suspect.
3. Sense of Entitlement: "No one ever shared their widget with me, why should I share mine?"
4. No quid pro quo: Why are we being Dr. Lecters?
5. Laziness: If we loan something out, we might have to put out an effort to try and get it back.

The Biggest Fear

Like most undesirable traits, we have come to this habit via fear.  Through the odd bad experience with sharing we have all become a combination of Homer Simpson, Hannibal Lecter, and Columbo.  Furthermore, we are afraid that the person requesting our resource is exactly like us.  Can I get a “D’oh?”

What have you shared lately?

Photo © Belongs To: http://www.flickr.com/photos/naturesdawn/

Submitted by Danny Grubb, Seattle, WA

We have had two break-ins at our house before we had our twins.  Both times the criminals came in through our bedroom window while we were gone.  Since we have had babies I take our home security much more seriously.  A home is supposed to be a safe place.  Sometimes I wonder whether I’m being a little paranoid, but keeping my family safe has become one of my top priorities. 

Following are three strategies which I think can make a huge difference in the security of your family when they are home.

(Note: I have not provided specific product links as I believe it is important with home security to undertake your own research)

One: Get A Security System

Having a good security system means that you have to pay a monthly fee and some maintenance costs when issues arise. Having a security system which you are confident in is the most basic way to deter burglars. Here are a few things to keep in mind when purchasing a home security system.

• Make sure the company offers 24 hour monitoring
• Make sure the company has a good reputation
• Read the warranty
• Make sure the system has "Panic Codes" built in. For example: If you push 1 and 3 together the police come running, 3 and 9 the fire department, etc.
• The system should be able to accommodate a "Duress Code". You use this four-digit code if you are being forced to disable the alarm. The alarm will turn off, but the police will still come running.

Owning an alarm system will require you to adjust your behaviors slightly. With Home Invasions on the rise you should use your system when you are away as well as when you are home. You will want to be careful if you are cracking windows or answering the door (for someone you know) that you turn the alarm off first or you'll wake the entire neighborhood up.

Two: Secure Your Windows

This is where our house was vulnerable so I’ve put a lot of thought into this aspect of home security. These fixes will deter, confuse and maybe even frustrate potential burglars.

• Make sure your window construction is complicated (Blinds between the panes, laminations on the glass, multiple panes)
• Buy add-on locks to make unlocking the windows as complicated as a Chinese puzzle box.
• Use dowels in your window tracks to keep them from opening more than a few inches. Also, make sure your dowels are substantial and noticeable from the outside. At least an inch in diameter and paint them yellow if that helps.
• If you can't make your window installations more complicated (if you live in an apartment for instance) you can purchase battery operated window break monitors. They listen for the sound of glass breaking and make annoying noises like a smoke detector.

It is important to note that laminated glass can make it more difficult to break glass in order to get out of the house in an emergency.  Make sure that your family knows how to get out of the house if the need arises.

Three: Secure Your Doors

Yes, some burglars will try to get right through the front door. That's how most home invasions are performed. They either break your door down or get you to open it somehow. Here's how to defend yourself against invaders.

• Install quality locks. The investment is worth it.
• Sliding patio doors should have locks on the top and bottom.
• Any glass on your doors should be laminated.
• Make sure you can see out of your door (peephole, decorative glass pane)
• Bonus Points: Intercom system… communicate with people outside your door without opening it!

If Someone Still Breaks In

This is where a little bit of practice could really come in handy.  When you are woken out of your sleep to a loud noise your first instinct will be to turn the noise off.  The problem with that is that this tells the monitoring center that the alarm was a mistake and they should not respond.  Instead you should let the alarm continue to sound while you check your house or call police to the scene.  If you can hear or see the burglar in your house you should push your “Panic Code” to call the police.

Regarding Gun Safety And Kids

The act of storing a gun safely precludes you from using it in a time of crisis.  Essentially this limits your weapon to recreational endeavors.  If you don’t have your gun stored safely your child will eventually figure out how to put all the pieces together.  Believing your child is responsible enough to make intelligent decisions in regards to weapons carries a large risk.  In terms of home safety I am a strong believer in baseball bats (or big fat yellow window dowels).

Photo © Belongs To: http://www.flickr.com/photos/powerbooktrance/

Submitted by Danny Grubb, Seattle, WA

It was the Sunday before last, 2:00am. One of our 10 month old twins had a bad cold. She went to bed around 10pm like usual, but woke up screaming four hours later. She refused a bottle (VERY unusual) and then started breathing funny: Inhale, exhale, then a long pause! I had no idea what that meant, but I did know that I was ready to quit screwing around and take this kid to the Emergency Room.

First Lesson: Nothing Cures A Kid Faster Than The Waiting Room

The entire way to the ER was excruciating. She was in the back seat and all I could see was that she was tired. I couldn't tell if she was still breathing funny or breathing at all for that matter. When we finally arrived at the hospital I took her out of the seat and went into the ER.

She cracked her eyes open when we went inside and saw a bunch of new people. "Yay" she thought and started smiling at the receptionist. The triage nurse (the one who decides where you are in line) saw us moments later. My little girl who was miserable, refusing food, and breathing funny at home started laughing and clapping!

Second Lesson: Laughing Kids Are Last In Line

I still wanted to make sure that everything was ok… I wasn't too tired to remember what had gone on at home. So we waited… and waited… and waited. Nearly three hours later we were finally called in. She had been happily sleeping away on my lap. I had to pee like a racehorse!

Third Lesson: Piece Of Mind Is Worth The Wait

Inside the actual Emergency Room things started moving a little faster. The first thing they determined after about three different people listened to her chest is that she was wheezing (Score one for Dad). They tested for a couple of different possibilities and finally decided that she has Bronchiolitis. Bronchiolitis is an infection of the Bronchioles (the smallest part of the lungs) and can get severe enough to interfere with a Baby's breathing.

The Doctors told me I should have brought her in to get checked out and several warning signs to look for over the next week that would prompt me to bring her in again.

Fourth Lesson: Just Go!

You're not going to get laughed at for bringing your kid in for the sniffles. Emergency Rooms know how to handle the deluge of patients so that the most pressing cases are first in line. There is no need to feel guilty. If nothing is wrong, then great! If something is wrong then you'll be glad you went. Just remember to pee before you go.

Submitted by Danny Grubb, Seattle, WA

Every year we try to improve ourselves by pretending that the next year offers a second (third, fourth…) chance.  In fact it is the here and now… every second… which offers itself to you to mold as you will.  With this in mind, allow yourself to fail in 2010.  Fail and try again.  The commitment it takes to change habits or take on big projects or just to simply be a parent is gigantic and if we don’t allow ourselves to get it wrong every once in a while we will be doomed to a life without challenge or success.  Here are some things I will take on in 2010… maybe more than once.

Resolutions

1. Take some more time for myself.
2. Save more money.
3. Carry my kids more.
4. Take more pictures.
5. Think more.
6. Eat Breakfast.
7. Sing!
8. Have Big Birthday Parties.
9. Be Magical.
10. Manage my time better.
11. Read more books to my kids.
12. Toothcare for all in the house.
13. Coddle less.
14. Obey the rules.
15. Have the TV on less.
16. Use parenting as a learning opportunity.
17. Give better gifts.
18. Run!
19. Introduce my kids to healthier foods.
20. Play!
21. Give to Charity.
22. Be with more family during the Holidays.
23. Keep up with my Chores.
24. Keep Black Friday out of Thanksgiving.
25. Prepare for Emergencies.
26. Explore my passions.
27. Borrow Books.

For the holidays on my brand new blog I decided to host a little contest even though I’m lacking in ‘physical’ prizes to give away (I’m a dad with twins who blogs – nuff said).  But prizes isn’t really what the holidays is about anyway, is it?  I just wanted to have a great holiday story about fatherhood to share with everyone. 

My Facebook and Twitter friends did not disappoint with entries, even sending some links to previous postings on their blogs.  Our winner this year is Joel Schwartzberg, the author of “The 40-Year-Old Version: Humoirs of a Divorced Dad.” who bought a goat for his family – sort of.

Joel Schwartzberg - Getting Your Goat

Somewhere in Africa, there's a goat with an unsuspecting Kenyan family's name on it. I adopted the animal for them after coming across the idea in a holiday catalog from the non-profit group Heifer International. But the gift wasn't only for the Kenyan family; it was also for my own.

When I told my kids that one of their coveted Hanukkah presents would be rerouted to a needier family, they were confused at first, then entranced. Charlie was eager to plot Kenya on a globe, while my girls schemed ways of sending comfy goat beds overseas. It inspired more discussion than a typical holiday gift, even one that doubles as a cell phone, giggles when shook, and can safely bake small cakes. I just hope Heifer tapes a gift receipt to the goat's belly in case the family wants to trade up for a llama.

Offering gifts to less fortunate strangers feels right, but it's still pretty rare. Holiday compassion, which most of us value but seldom practice, is the opposite of holiday commercialism, which most of us practice but never value.

To be fair, you can find examples of holiday generosity when you look. Every winter, nonprofit organizations distribute donated coats to those who can't afford them, and toy collection efforts have been around since Silly Putty. But more often than not, those compassionate efforts only get substantial exposure when they're mired in controversy. The U.S. Marines' "Toys for Tots" program got its best publicity ever when it decided in 2006 to refuse a donation of thousands of gospel-spouting Jesus Christ dolls. They feared offending Jewish and Muslim families, or possibly confusing kids who might excitedly mistake Jesus for Obi-Wan Kenobi.

But faster than you can say "Merry Christmas and Welcome to Wal-Mart," the Marines did an about-face and accepted the dolls anyway. Note if you receive one: batteries are not included, and possibly some Assembly of God required.

Growing up Jewish, I've never really connected holiday compassion to Hanukkah, which is more about spirituality than selflessness. The festival of lights focuses on the story of Jews who, for lack of an all-night convenience store, ran perilously low on olive oil, but managed to make it last eight nights. I have the same miraculous experience with my toothpaste every six months or so, but I keep that to myself.

I didn’t really begin to consider religion seriously until late in life, despite some formal religious training in my youth. When I was 13, I had my Bar Mitzvah in Alief, Texas, a tiny suburb outside Houston. Our congregation’s temple was so miniscule that we’d rent out the local church for big events. We’d just hide the crosses and New Testaments and Oy Voila: a perfect Bar Mitzvah venue. The only problem were the invitations:

“Come celebrate Joel Schwartzberg’s Bar Mitzvah and his transition to Jewish manhood…at the First Church of Jesus Christ Our Lord and Savior.”

When I left home for NYU, it wasn’t long before I began rationalizing forbidden practices like eating on Yom Kippur, making sandwiches on Passover, and ordering shrimp appetizers. I joined a large Jewish student organization, but like so many others in the group, I was more focused on dating than deities. In fact, I think it was those guys who introduced me to shrimp.

Naturally, I passed my lazy reverence onto my kids, whose exposure to their own religion has been limited to annual HanukkahBrachos and one overtly Jewish Power Ranger. (Season 13’s Bridge Carson, if you must know. He couldn’t have been Bridge Goldstein?)

During holiday time I unpack our Hanukah menorah and yarmulkes the way other families unpack tree ornaments. But the messages get a little muddled. My kids and I light candles each night, but they also exchange gifts on Christmas morning. We spin dreidels, but also stop and gawk at elaborate decorations on neighboring houses. We focus a little too much on presents, but also…focus a little too much on presents.

That’s why I like to come back to the compassion thing. Connecting the holiday to acts of selfless generosity, like gifting a goat, is a mitzvah that creates no messy religious inconsistencies, unless said goat is also a Scientologist.

Our new Kenyan friends don't need to be thinking of me and my kids when their gift arrives, though they can pay it forward. The great thing about this kind of program is that recipients traditionally "pass on" their animals' offspring to others in their community. Not only can't you do that with a Playstation 3, but it isn't even considered re-gifting!

My main hope is that, through our generosity, the Kenyan family realizes there are parts of the better-developed world where, come holiday time, caring families of all faiths will still go out and practice compassion alongside religion and frenzied holiday shopping.

And as long as those people are out, they should pick up some extra olive oil just in case.

Thank you to everyone who submitted their Holiday Stories!  They were truly fun to read.  You can look forward to the same contest next year… this time with a Prize!  Maybe even a Goat!

Submitted by Danny Grubb, Seattle, WA

Congratulations on becoming the proud owner of your very own diaper bag.  If you’re lucky whoever bought the bag for you bought it at DadGear.com or DiaperDude.com.  If your new bag has flowers or over-primped ponies on it, carry it with pride!  Dads will not judge you on your Diaper Bag, instead they will give you a knowing look saying “Carry on brother! We are Men and we don’t need a bag to tell us that".

Now that we got the Pep Talk out of the way, lets get down to the details.

The Packing List

Lets face it, most Men are minimalists and can pack everything they need for a weekend in a daypack.  This behavior will not cut it in baby land though.  You must pack for contingencies.  If your baby poops on herself or gets scratched when you put her in the stroller, you need to be ready.  With your Diaper Bag comes the responsibility to be as prepared as a Navy Seal storming an enemy ship.  Here are the things you will need for your mission.

Diapering:

• Changing Pad - Something you can unfold one-handed.
• Diapers – Pack 1 per hour (at least).
• Wipes - Travel sized container.
• Diaper rash ointment – Diaper Rash always pops up at the most inopportune moment.
• Changes of clothes - Yes, this goes in the “Diapering” category.
• Ziploc Bags – Good for dirty diapers when you don’t have any place to dispose of them, also good for dirty clothes.  These bags are so useful they should be the most plentiful item in your bag.

Feeding:

• Bottles – Pack 1 per hour.
• Formula or Breastmilk – Enough to fill each bottle.
• Burp Cloths or Bibs – 1 for every 2 hours.
• Bottled Water – Enough for you and for your baby (if feeding formula).

Other:

• Tissues – Always a very useful parenting item.
• First Aid Kit – As complete as you can get and still fit into your bag comfortably.
• Blankets – 1 or 2
• Pacifiers
• Toys
• Teething Rings
• Extra Set of Keys – You don’t want to be locked out of your house or the car with (or worse – without) the baby!
• Hand Sanitizer

Pack Smart

You will want to pack everything into your diaper bag by frequency of use.  So diapering and feeding supplies should go on top.  Things that are in the “Other” category you can bury a little deeper.  Once you go out a few times you’ll know what the important stuff is.

Remember To Stock Up

You should be vigilant about stocking your diaper bag to make sure you don’t leave the house having forgotten something important.  Running out of Ziploc bags or tissues can be especially annoying!

There it is, everything you need to know about Diaper Bag ownership. People will be in awe at your cat-like readiness. So hold your head high Dads… you’re representing all of us.

What do you find indispensible in your Diaper Bag?

Submitted by Danny Grubb, Seattle, WA

We owe it to our families to be prepared in case of emergencies.  In the Pacific Northwest people worry about Volcanic Eruptions and Earthquakes.  In Florida people worry about Hurricanes and Floods.  In the Northeast people worry about Snow Storms.  Every place has risks associated with living there.  Your family's Home Emergency kit should be customized to fit your region's specific risks.

When it comes to Emergency Kits we're really talking about two different types.  One for your home and one for each vehicle your family travels in.  Good basic checklists can be found at the links below.

The Home Kit

The Vehicle Kit

Basic Kits Don't Cut It

These above links refer to basic Emergency Kits and should be modified to fit your specific needs.  Here are some examples of things to consider:

• If you live in a colder climate or in a location where it temperatures change drastically between daytime and nighttime, you will want to make sure that you have extra fire-starting equipment, clothing, and blankets. 

• If you live in a climate which can be wet (such as the pacific northwest) make sure you have rain gear and extra clothing.

• If you live in a dry or hot climate, double the recommended 1gal/day of emergency water supply.

• If you live in a place which is likely to flood, flotation devices or inflatable watercraft will be important.

Scrutinize Every Detail Now

When you prepare your emergency kit, each item on the checklist must be carefully scrutinized.  Ask yourselves these questions for each item:

1. Do I need this item at all?

2. Do I need 2x or 3x as much of this item as is recommended?

3. Is this item sufficient for the types of emergencies I am planning for?

The second level of scrutinizing comes when you try to plan for each of your family members.  Here are two questions to ask yourself for each family member:

1. What basic needs does this family member have which is not covered by the Kit?

2. If we have to evacuate, what will this family member need to travel?

Moving The Emergency Kit

Great, you've got your Emergency Kit finished, every item has been carefully scrutinized and each family member will have everything they need.  If evacuation is necessary, how will you evacuate your Emergency Kit along with your family?

This is a tough problem.  By definition an Emergency Kit covers only the basic essentials and should not be pared down.  However, in case of an evacuation your immediate safety may be more pressing than your survival over the next three days.  Try to contain your emergency kit in two  plastic containers which will fit easily into your car (or your inflatable raft).  Additionally, all electronic and clothing items in the Kit should be packed in watertight bags or containers.

Some other things you can do to cut down on the size and weight of your emergency kit are:

1. Put important documents on a disk or thumb drive.

2. Choose lighter and smaller items whenever possible (ex: Having two flashlights which run on 2-AAs rather than one flashlight running on 4-Ds.)

3. Pack efficiently.  Challenge yourself to pack the Emergency Kit into smaller containers every year.

Revisit Your Family's Emergency Kit Annually

Every year as part of your spring cleaning routine - every Family should have one - go through every item in your Kit.  Do the following:

1. Replace all the Water.

2. Replace all the Food.

3. Replace all the Batteries.

4. Place your important documents on another backup disk and place it in the Kit with the old one (Even Media can go bad and another backup won't hurt).

5. Test every piece of electronic equipment in your Kit to make sure it works.

6. Wash the clothes and blankets.

7. Change the clothes to fit your family's new sizes and shapes. That's right, our children grow up while we grow out.

8. Attempt to place all items into smaller containers.

This is an extremely important subject.  If you feel that I've left something out or that something I've said doesn't make sense, please comment below.  At the very least ask yourself this:

Where is your Family's Emergency Kit?

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The FTC is requiring all blogs to have a Disclosure Policy.  And since GladDads.com is technically a blog we will gladly comply.

Why is the FTC making bloggers write disclosure policies?  Because bloggers get free stuff (so I hear) from companies who want them to write reviews.  Occasionally bloggers are even paid for their reviews (yikes!).  This policy outlines how GladDads.com handles these touchy subjects.

The Policy

1.  If you send free stuff for us to review it will be reviewed only if the product complements the spirit and mission of GladDads.com. The review will by honest (i.e. If your product is crap, we will call it crap) and the source of the product will be disclosed.  Once the product has been reviewed it will be given away in a contest (If the product is crap, I will let my children try to flush it down the toilet – where crap goes). 

2.  GladDads.com will NEVER take money for writing a review.  This practice diminishes a writer’s credibility and quite frankly, were better than that.

3.  All writers who post to GladDads.com will be subject to the above rules.

You can always trust GladDads.com to be honest and truthful in all of our writing.  We value our credibility and integrity above all else.  If we have done something to make you think otherwise, challenge us and it will be corrected. 

Submitted by Danny Grubb, Seattle, WA

Unless you've had children before you are likely ill prepared for what awaits you when you get home. Your new baby takes up so much of your time with the hourly feedings, diaper changes and various cries which you are weeks away from understanding. Meanwhile your list of to-dos just piles up and you begin to wish that you could just buy another house and leave this mess in the hands of a childless couple who "aren't ready for kids". Keeping your house clean will help keep you and your spouse sane, so it is important to learn how to manage your time effectively.

The Mobile Theory

Your baby will go through various stages throughout a day which more or less include the following:

1. Sleeping - That's always a crowd-pleaser.
2. Maintenance Need - That's when the baby needs to be changed or fed or bathed.
3. Entertainment Need - That's when the baby wants YOU to entertain her.
4. Self-Entertaining - When the baby is able to self-play.

So the question becomes, during what stage is the best time to get chores done? If you answered "1" then you're like most first-time parents. This isn't necessarily a wrong answer, but there are better things to be doing while the baby is sleeping, such as sleeping.

The better answer is "4". Mobiles weren't invented by accident, these are tools for the baby to be entertained without the parent being in the immediate vicinity. When the baby is entertaining herself, this is your opportunity to do some dishes or start a load of laundry without wasting precious sleep time.

Not all babies are willing to play ball with the self-entertaining, so if worse comes to worse, wait until both parental units are home. One spouse watches the baby while the other one cleans. This will happen so just be prepared.

Do More Chores Faster

There are a few things you can do to maximize your effectiveness at doing your chores.

1. Make a list

Create a list of chores that you can use as a reference. Key things that should be on the list is a place where you can mark the chore as complete and a place where you can designate who is responsible for completing the chore. (Here is a template we really like)

1. Get some perspective

SimpleMom.net is a great place for learning how to keep a clean (and simple) house as parents. One of the best articles I've read on SimpleMom gave me some real perspective on what kind of time commitment is necessary to keep a house clean.

If you follow these tips you'll be well on your way to staying ahead of your housekeeping. Of course as new parents you do have an advantage for the first few weeks. For instance, if one of our friends wanted to come and see the twins in their first month, they had to do a chore. No Exceptions.

How do you keep up with your chores?

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Submitted by Danny Grubb, Seattle, WA

A lot of families make it a point to give to charities every year.  The holidays are a perfect time to go through this process.  Children sometimes hear about people who are less fortunate than they are, but don’t know what they can do to help.  Making charitable giving a family affair and doing the necessary research can give everyone a new view of the world.  Here are some ways to get your children engaged. 

Let The Kids Help in Choosing Charities

Work with your family throughout the year to talk about “What charities are we considering this year?”  Throughout the year your family will no doubt hear of causes that interest them.  If they hadn’t acted on that interest before, the holiday charity can be their excuse.  When doing your due diligence on a potential charity make sure that you are able to locate the following information either on the charity’s website or by having the charity send you copies in the mail:

1. Literature on what specifically the Charity does.
2. The Charity’s financial statements to ensure that they use most of their money on actually doing charitable work.
3. A copy of the charity’s IRS form 990, which it submits to keep its exempt status.

Finally, do an internet search with the charity’s name and the word “Scam” in the string.  This should provide you with any links which claim that the charity is not doing what it is supposed to.  Go over as much of this information with your kids as you think they are willing to hear about.  When your kids are younger, sticking to children’s charities can help keep their interest.  As your kids get older, they may be doing this due diligence by themselves and coming to you with ideas.  All of this effort throughout the year should end with a short list of 5 to 10 charities which warrant your attention on the big day.

Funding a Giving Budget

If your kids receive allowance throughout the year you can give them a choice to hold some of it back for the holiday charities (this will be a good introduction to payroll deductions).  Or they can save up their own allowance to give to the charity.  You can tell them that for every dollar they contribute you will match x dollars.  This will give them an incentive to make a good effort. 

Playing the Game

This can be the most fun part of the whole process.  I have heard of some families doing Monopoly® tournaments or poker tournaments for the right to choose the top charity.  Choose your family’s favorite game and turn it into a competition.  Whoever wins the tournament will get to choose the charity that gets the top prize.  Of course no charity on your short list should go away empty handed.  Here is an example of how things might work out.

5 charities on the short list

$200 total budget

$20 minimum donation

RESULT: The winning charity gets $120 and the four runners up get $20.

It may seem like quite a bit of effort to go through just to give to a charity.  Going through this process from beginning to end will teach your kids a lot of lessons about selflessness, compassion and responsibility.  Of course the fact that it will provide some entertainment during the holidays isn’t bad either.  The charities you give to will no doubt send you thank you letters which always make good refrigerator fodder. 

What will you do this holiday season to teach your kids about the importance of giving?

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Submitted by Danny Grubb, Seattle, WA

My twin girls were born in March 2009.  I have never been happier in my life than being a husband and a father.  I find myself wondering what they will be like when they’re older.  My next thought usually involves a not-so-happy theme of “Where will I be when they’re older?” My Mother died of lung cancer when I was only 11 and heart disease runs in my family.  I have known – indirectly – at least 2 people in their thirties who died of heart attacks.  I have known several others who have lived through them.  The question of where I will be when my kids grow up makes me VERY nervous.

Like a lot of guys, I didn’t pay attention to my health in my 20’s.  I ate fast food almost daily.  I exercised in spurts most notably completing the Seattle half marathon in 2006 (for which I only trained 8 weeks) and taking 6 months of cardio kickboxing in 2008.  Don’t be fooled though, around and between these two periods I was as sedentary as they come.  I could eat a pint of Ben & Jerry’s within 15 minutes or finish an entire (large) bag of BBQ potato chips.

Oh sure, I had excuses.  I was working full time and going to school full time.  My wife and I were going through some traumatic events related to cancer and fertility.  But I knew what I was doing.  When I got stressed out with school I would get short of breath so bad that I had trouble falling asleep at night.  This was partly due to stress and partly due to all the crap that had built up in my lungs from not exercising.  I was not doing good.  My body type wasn’t helping either.  I’m a pretty skinny guy – “good” you say, but not so – when skinny guys add fat, the fat gets added not so much outward, but inward.  Skinny guys can get fat build up between and around their organs making it harder for their body to do just about anything worth doing.  This is what was happening to me.

So I did a small thing.  There has been in our garage for a number of years this rather unique clothes rack with a digital display, an electric motor, and a power cord – our treadmill.  It hadn’t been turned on in years.  When I plugged it in and let it run for a few minutes, it tripped the CGFI outlet in our garage (an outlet with a breaker in it, required in garages).  This was a problem because I knew nothing about wiring and outlets.  It was also a problem because this stupid electrical outlet was standing in the way of me getting healthier.  Alas, over a week with the help of a few friends I managed to troubleshoot my way through.  The treadmill lives.

With twins I don’t get a lot of time to exercise, but I try to get in 30 minutes a day, 5 days a week.  When I was training for the half marathon before it was mostly an academic exercise to prove that I could actually do it with just 8 weeks of training.  This time I feel like I’m running so that I can continue to be a father and a husband.  I’m not feeling any improvements to my health yet.  I still have trouble getting a breath sometimes during stressful situations and occasionally I’m still pretty lethargic. 

But I’m finally doing something, for my whole family.  As a former child who lost a parent I feel that parents should make it their goal to be healthier for the sake of their children.  I am inspired by my family to continue being fitter and also set a good example for them.  My girls don’t know it yet, but their Dad will be around to bug them for a long time.